Taming the demon called PACKING before a trip with small children

I and J cannot stay without taking our holiday breaks quite often. It could be a small weekend gateway or a planned good 7 days one but yes we need to break free from the mundane routine life regularly to keep our sanity intact. The result being we have travelled with both our young ones when they were as little as 3 months old.

Packing smartly and fast was one of the few virtues I have inherited from my late mom and hence J gives me a complete free hand when it comes to packing and unpacking before and after every break. Actually it works well for him and poor I usually left with a sore back after numerous sessions of bending….:)

When packing I follow few basic rules :

• Invest in a good toiletries bag and a medicine pouch. Here goes the full family ration in one place, starting from toothpaste to perfume to lotion to sunscreen in the toiletries bag and from Crocin syrup to strips of Saridon in the medicine pouch. You never have to hunt later to find them while on a trip


• Count the day and take 1.5 sets of clothes for children and 1 set for each adult and off course one set of inner wears for all for each day. A denim pant can be pired with different shirts many a times and I keep this in mind while packing


• Separate bags for children helps. I use one suitcase for both my daughters and one for both of us and partition it with the little ones blanket and one of my scarfs respectively. After I am done with clothes I focus on accessories for them and me and that too goes in pouches too inside the suitcases


• Carry comfortable footwear appropriate for the place one is visiting. I usually carry one pair of walking shoes and one indoor ones and only if there is an opportunity for formal occasion then a pair of formal shoes. I generally use the outer chamber of our suitcase (note mine and J’s) for shoes. The shoes are generally packed inside a shoe bag and then placed in the chamber


• Then our third bag which has all the diapers, sterilizers, bottles, biscuits, Gerber or Heinz Baby food (for K2) and all our chargers for different gizmos. I have this bag since K2 is small and I am certain in 2/3 years I won’t need this and our chargers can be accommodated in one of our suitcases’ chambers

Generally I check-in these three bags if we are taking a flight

• My hand baggage is generally restricted to two but since K2 is only a year old we have a third one exclusively for her.

• 1st hand bag has our camera and all other electronics like IPads, kindles and books for K. Which is generally the backpack J carries

• 2nd handbag is K2’s bag with one or two change of clothes for her, few diapers, baby wipes, her milk and water bottles, sanitizers, few food items for her as well a K , a dirty bag to throw soiled diaper, a changing sheet

• 3rd bag is my hand bag with my purse, our travel itinerary, my instant face lifter my lipstick and compact etc

If you have a regular way of packing, you are always aware where each article is kept and you never waste time in a holiday trying to find them. This also makes the entire chore of packing far easier, when you know in your mind or have a list on what you need to pack and what goes where.

I have followed these few set rules which helped me relax in my holidays knowing well that I have carried what I need and not more to shell out extra for overshooting the baggage allowance. Number and size of luggages off course got modified with new additions in our family, but I am still the efficient packers as I was 11 years back when we had our first trip….. our honeymoon:)

Sanity intact In the midst of diapers homework and office

K was already six when K2 came into our life. Life was exciting and somehow we were prepared for the roller coaster ride that is awaiting us till at least K2 is big enough to go to school at the most. K2 completes a year this August and these are some of the ground rules which helped me to manage and keep my sanity alive

Disclaimer: But before everything, if you are a working mom which I am, the most two essentials are

a)      Good Nanny and house helps b) Supportive partners. All the below is applicable only then:

·         Divide and relax

Since the time K2 was bottled fed me and J have managed to have an unwritten understanding that we will ensure that one of us gets his/her sleep and one takes the responsibility. There have been nights which were horrifying and crazy with both of us trying to handle a cranky baby who cannot tell us what is wrong and we keep browsing through the infant medicine box on what will calm or soothe her, but for most of the other nights somehow it worked. So in the morning one of us has red eyes and the one without, sat behind the wheel to drive to work.

Ditto with all other things, we check our calendars to ensure one of us is available in town for anything urgent with the kids be it a doc appointment or an annual day. If I am busy with taking K's studies J keeps K2 engaged.

·         Embrace convenience

I seriously cannot comprehend how our parents handled us in the pre-diaper age...do I sound like a Fossil? Well Potty training can wait! When you don’t want a wet baby catching cold and a sleep deprived adult checking round the clock for the soggy cloth panties, please embrace the diaper. We have not seen any 4 years old with a diaper right….so your one will also not be one. At least I am hoping so :)

·         Embrace Technology: Whatsup

I seriously don’t know what I would have done if there was no Whatsup. Thanks to this incredible mode of communications and the other 34 great Moms in K’s class that I am a good mother who never misses sending the right clay dough or craft papers to school and making sure all homework is complete and K is well revised before an exam. These 34 incredible moms many of whom I personally have not met are my lifeline are really a blessings in my life.

·         Priorities

Home Delivery with a call or a click away is actually my time manager. I don’t spend time in doing grocery or queuing up to pay bills. My Smartphone does all, all I have to remember (which again the Smartphone alarm does) is to order and log to pay on time. Time save is the time for kids, hubby and myself.

·         Some Commitments

During the weekdays, the kids are with their nanny so we make sure that weekends and evening (though in Mumbai these can be late evening with the unbelievable amount of traffic) its always is the kids time. OUT goes all dinner or drinks date with colleagues or business associate or  watching a film or series in television IN comes Lots of hugs and kisses full play time, birthday parties and house parties with friends who has similar age kids. Who is complaining? Actually not that I don’t crave for the OUTs but the INs gives the most unadulterated fun I could ever look forward to. K loves to cook with me and love the story session with J or make her sand castle on the sea shore and here’s hoping as K2 grows up will have more such fun thing to look forward to do as family. So weekends are family time.       

•           Practice & Preach 

As parents we are the examples and if we watch television while dining or the TV remote and the Mobile phone are our constant companion when at home, how can possibly you ask your nanny not to watch television series with the kids around? how can you ask your kids to switch off the television when food is on the table. Well, that doesn't mean we never cheat, the trick is when we cheat we cheat together for a family movie or a YouTube funny video all while the dinner is on with a hearty laugh. But next day we are back on track so from straight jacket weekdays we move into disorderliness in our weekends…………We don’t deprive ourselves from the junks, a Friday Maggi in the Tiffin, a roadside Pani Puri session and offocurse all those binge session in local eateries.

The idea is the way you balance and as tough it seems, with a little bit of planning and support life is not so bad......

C- Section or Normal

Like many would be Mommy I had to go through this huge dilemma which one is better.....been there and after going through both all  I can say its a catch 22 situation.

My first one was a classic case of normal delivery with onset of pain albeit a long one, water pipe breaking and then delivery. Post that stitches in not so pleasant place and more than a month of heavy bleeding.

Second one gave me limited choice with a cord in the neck , after consultation with my gynac had to opt for an elective C- Section. This time with a near painless spine injection, smooth delivery, one day in 360 angle and a month or two of niggling pain in the stitches.

With very little support at home, I was doing almost all household chores the moment I have come home from the hospital in both the times, but second time with the C-Sec I had to remember how much I can bend, how much weight I can carry etc whereas in the first instance I was free to do anything....off course had to live with the heavy bleeding for sometime

Having a baby is one of the greatest gift and joy once can feel and the pleasure of motherhood makes us forget the torture our body goes through and certainly it is a very small price to pay for the happiness and fulfillment a baby brings to our life. So when I get questioned which one is a better one...most of the time I am so unsure. Then I put my logical hat and start thinking.....well both has its ups and down...so called normal or natural  delivery is a painful process when one is at it but mostly comfortable after, where as C-Section is absolutely painless when one is in the middle of the thing, but it is a major surgery and one has to be careful post delivery to avoid further complications. At the end of the day to whose its own...if you are fortunate enough to get a chance to make a decision.

At the end its being able to be a mother of the tiny bundle of joy is all that matters!!!!

Fulfilling Dinner time

Our little K is soon going to be 6 yrs old lady. She is still the doll both J and me want to curdle, she still has the round baby cheeks which I want to pull, still has all the innocence bundled up in all her curiosity.


Our K is no longer the fussy eaters but a foodie like her daddy which gives her Mami a little more incentive to turn around some of her cooking experiment. Of course there is still the long face when you give her the regular Indian food without her share of her favourite non-veg but I must say our daughter is an angle, she is ready to experiment with food and ready to have with a little bit of push from our side, various kind of fruits and vegetables.

But the journey was not smooth (my earlier post has plenty of example how fussy she was at 1-3 yrs of age). However some instinct in me told me not to give up. So I experimented with vegetables, added them into her favourite junks (Noodles/Pasta/Pizza), made soups with loads of butter and cream, added variety of seasoning and dressing in raw salads, combined them with her favourite meat stew & sandwiches, grilled fishes, pureed dishes and after trying for almost 2 years our daughter no longer shy away from vegetables. It may not be the favourite item in her plate but she is no longer the girl for whom vegetable means only potato.

Ditto with fruits, menu changed regularly from banana to papaya to watermelon to apple with added seasonal varieties of mango, strawberries, oranges but two serving of fruits became a regular feature in her diet. It’s been a long journey from pureed apple and mashed banana to uncut apple but it has been a pleasurable one when I see our little one with her spoon and fork trying to finish a meal with us which has some nutritional value.

The only hitch now is the time taken to finish those meals in between stories and conversation, but who is complaining????As K’s parents we just eagerly wait for that time of the day in the dinner table when clock can stand still and we all can slow down after a long day.

Mom; Look what I got as a return gift!

We debated and debated “shall we shall we not”,,,,,,, well the question was shall we throw a party for K’s first B’day or let it be just a family affair. Well as a child whose all b’days were celebrated with full of fan fair I could not deprive K from a great celebration…..well may be I could not deprive myself from a celebration.

Nevertheless, believe me organizing a party and that too at home was not easy. The first thing we did is to create the laundry list of things to do……..and Oh! Boy when the list was ready I didn’t know where to start from……….first came the list of invitees, then the menu and the caterer, followed by the B’day cake which we ordered in the shape of “Mini Mouse” , home decorative and lastly the most toughest of all purchasing “RETURN GIFTS”. We had kids ranging from the age of 6 months to 13 years invited for the party and you can imagine how tough it was for us to select gifts that will appeal to all. K started getting B’day parties invitation when she was barely 3 months old and in all B’days, the host took the effort for giving her something appropriate to her age. Now its turn for her, parents and we went crazy. Thanks to a well-equipped shop and an intelligent shopkeeper, we managed to zero in on individual gifts for all. This was our first time and coming straight from an era where return gifts were merely restricted to pencil, eraser etc we hope we did an okay job to satisfy our junior guests.

However, what I have to hear from friends on this concept of return gift was scary. From a gesture to say “Thank You” this has become a tool of showing off. Starting from the child to the parents’ ones status is pulled up and down in the weighing scale on a basis of the “Return Gift” they give on B’days. Friends with little bigger kids and loads of experience have already warned us, that this is just the beginning and we should wait for K to go to school and see what she brings and what we will HAVE TO GIVE. A neighborhood friendly shopkeeper cannot bell us out; branded shops in dazzling malls have to be the destination.

So in few years it will still be “shall we shall we not” only the question will change to shall we visit X malls for buying the Return Gift or just go to a neighboring shop and let our so called “Status” drain down the sewage pipe.

Support me please

This month was the fist time that my 10 months stayed without her mom for four days courtesy an office engagement of mine where I needed to travel out of the country.

It is certainly a difficult decision, where I am still working half times from home and trying to manage both fonts properly. We debated a lot on what we should do. .I could not escape this trip, and thanks to J who volunteered to manage his darling and must say, he did a great job. Yes! when I came back our daughter looked healthy, pretty and happy, though I would like to believe her spirits were little down as she missed her Ma (possessive emotional mother u see!!)

It was the first time, so quiet likely I was not up my spirit when I was away and any little kid I use to come across in the road, use to make me feel more home sick. What irritated me the most is to give answer to all and sundry about who is taking care of my daughter and how I have left her at home? My husband is good with kids and so are several of my friends husband and they all can baby -sit as good as any one of us mummies, then why the question???? Few months back, my husband was away for an office assignments and as per as I remember no one questioned on how I managed and since both me and J share most of the work I too felt exhausted just like how J also felt in my absence. In both the occasion needless to say K was managed perfectly, so the household.

It is just that as a women and especially as a working women you are under the scanner every time, where all and sundry would like to check how you are managing your responsibilities of home and outside. Though we say the society has progressed and has accepted that man and wife are equal and they should share all chores, in reality for household and children matter we still live in the world where it has to be the women who is responsible. I thank God that I have a supportive husband and feel bad for those working mother who may not be as lucky as I am.

Mum! Night is still young, let us play.

K was always a good girl, never really kept me and her father awake apart from the first 4 days, when she was in the Lilavati hospital, which inspite of being one of the best hospitals in the city I live in, has no nursery for infants.

However, since last one week, things have changed drastically. She refuses to go to bed at 9:30 PM, which was so far her standard time, and she prefers to get up several times in between sleep and at 4 in the morning, she expects us to play with her. However, she seems to be doing okay with so less of sleep or in between making it up during the day her parents are having a tough time. She is turning 10 months today and I am just not sure, what phase of life we are entering.

Is this something to do with insecurity, as I am working mother and she spends almost 11 hours in a day with her bay sitter? To confirm I checked her pattern staying at home for 2 days but it had no effect and the 4 clock playing schedule continues. We even got her to our bed at night from her cot, but it is of no avail.

So ,as for now in concern, its wait and watch policy with an expectation this will pass soon.